What and If..?
Two
completely innocent and inconspicuous words in the English language, yet when
put together they can run rampant through ones mind without ceasing. They cause
mayhem, twisted perceptions, and regret wherever they are allowed to run
without rein. So why do people let them run with such abandon?
I’ve
recently had some great advice: Don’t live in the past, what’s been done is
done, But don’t look too far into the future either, that can lead to anxiety
and frustration. Instead live in the present, be thankful for what you have and
are given on a daily basis. BUT don’t let chances fly by you. If you love
something, or someone, have the courage to reach out and try. Because you never
know what might happen.
What if
I had never kissed my ex-fiancé? Never accepted the invite up to their vacation
4 years ago this month? Yes, I would have saved myself from hurt, confusion and
heartbreak. But I would have missed on all of the growing opportunities that
have molded me into the person I am today. Maybe I would have fallen for
someone else that would have been worse? Maybe I would have been lonely the
whole time? Maybe I would have gone off to a school out of state and met
friends and possibly a different guy? The possibilities are endless and also
happen to be endlessly maddening.
No one
can know what might have been, we are not supposed to. The only thing that we
can control as finite human beings is what happens now. Right now, in this very
moment. I could stop writing right now and put away laundry, but then would I ever
have the courage to finish what I started here? Would I come back maybe after
work and finish? Or would I leave it be and never look at it again, and it
would fall into the forgotten files in the hard drive of my laptop? The What
Ifs are endless and only continue in circles. People can be driven mad by
picking apart the past. By constantly thinking over past arguments, things that
should not have been said, and things that weren’t said all twist into a
downward spiral.
Therefore
people must recognize when the opportunity to do something truly unique comes
along. Or maybe someone is scared to ask out the boy or girl that they like and
instead sit and watch as someone else swoops in while they were busy over thinking.
They missed their chance.
So what
if it doesn’t work out? All we can do is try. We don’t know the future, and
that is something that I am personally thankful for every day. We don’t need to
see what’s going to happen and look forward to it, we need to look forward to
what today can be. Maybe you smile at someone who’s having a bad day, or maybe
someone is rude to you. Not because you did anything to offend them, but maybe
instead of being rude or using sharp words, back we treat that person with
kindness and respect. And maybe that’s all they need to realize that life isn’t
as bad as they thought. Or that someone else cares enough to ask what’s really
going on. Or maybe they just need someone to listen.
Everyone
has things in their past that they aren’t too proud of. Or things happened in
such a way that they aren’t happy about. The key is to accept what happened,
learn from it to not make the same mistake or decision again, and then move
forward with their life making better decisions in the next instance that comes
along.
And who
knows? Maybe that one chance conversation, comment, gentle reminder that you
care will make all the difference; not only in your life but in the other
persons too.
