So I had an entire blog post written out and scheduled to
post today, but I feel like I need to share how God brought Josh into my life.
I know this blog isn’t really a platform for many personal things, but this is
too important not to share.
Let’s start off with some background information on me to
set the stage. In college I met someone and we dated, and then became engaged
during the 3 years we were together. However, he was not the one meant for me,
and eventually I realized that and we broke up. I dated here and there
afterward, never really finding anyone to “click with” so I made a promise not
to date for a year.
During that year I wrote three books, and edited a draft of
two I had previously written. I got a better job; I bought a car, got involved
with a young adults group at my church, and was way more involved in NANOWRIMO.
Then in a twist that rocked me to my core, I lost that better job after 18
months. “Downsizing”. No one likes that
word. So there I was, jobless, facing my absolute worst fear. As I was driving away that fateful Tuesday morning,
tears streaming down my face, I threw my hands in the air and said “Okay God,
you gave this job to me for a reason, I know you’ve got a plan and I will trust
in that plan.”
A sense of peace came over me. That said, I put in several
resumes and started job searching that day. But all the while I felt this sense
of peace. That everything was going to work out. I went on job interviews, and
sent out more resumes. But what I did everyday was edit. I was able to edit two
books during the month a half before I was given the job I have now. And I remember
my last interview here lasted all of 15 min, I drove home thinking I didn’t get
it.
As I was changing out of the dress clothes I had worn, I got
the call. “We’d like to offer…” and I said yes. However, the job was 45 min
away from my parent’s house, where I had been living at the time. I thought “Thank
you God! I know it’s a drive, but I have a more fuel efficient car, so it’ll be
fine. I will go where you are leading me.”
I started, and of course went through the training, though
if I’m honest, I still am in training. There is just so much to learn, it will
take years to amass the knowledge necessary to be really good at my job. I was
here a month a half when something sparked me to post on Facebook that I was
done with men again, and that I was ready to go back to the no dating rule.
Just an aside, I never post that kind of thing publicly, so that was totally
God. Then one of my old managers from my Walgreens days messaged me saying that
if I wanted to, she had someone I should meet. And that he was even a Christian.
I have never dated a man who believed in God. Well, maybe
one or two of them did, but they weren’t church goers, and truly in the faith.
So during my year of no dating, I realized that I should pray for my future
spouse; that they would be a Godly man, who knew a personal relationship with
Jesus.
We started texting on a Monday night after work. We texted
all night. It was amazing. He was smart, funny, and we had some common
interests and life experiences. We texted all the next day, and decided to meet
after work on Wednesday. We texted all that day too, literally up until he
walked through the door at Starbucks.
When he walked in he was everything I had prayed for in a
man. He was tall, with wide shoulders, green eyes, and dirty blonde hair. He
had strong, able, honest hands and eyes. And I trusted him immediately. Halfway
through talking, I felt something telling me that he was the one I was waiting
for, that he was my missing half. We ended up closing Starbucks down. And for
those of you that know me, I am not a talker. But I can sit and talk with him
for hours, from the weather, to movies, to TV, to Harry Potter, and not grow
bored. I remember leaving thinking, “What does he see in me?”, and that I knew
I had to see him again.
The amazing thing was that he lived not ten minutes from my
new work. We met again that Saturday, for a day trip to the museum and then he
wanted to make me dinner. The entire time we were in one of the exhibits I wanted
him to kiss me, and then he did! And it was amazing. Indescribable, even to
this day. And I knew that I wanted to kiss only him for the rest of life.
And he felt the same way about me! Everything is talked
about between us, I have never had that. There is no fear of being judged. I
can be my completely goofy, clumsy, nerdy self around him. I literally could
not imagine my life without him in it. I
need him in a way that I have never felt.
So that is why we are getting married in January. Because when
you meet your soul mate, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as
possible. Not because of any other reason. Everything that led us together was
not our doing. Not at all; it was all God. And I thank Him every day for
bringing me the husband that I wanted, needed, and never thought I’d have.
Sorry for the length, I could have broken this into several
parts, and maybe I will at a later time. But I felt that this needed sharing; for
anyone struggling right now, or maybe someone out there needed a reminder. There
is someone who loves and cares for you. He is waiting, knocking, and He wants
to give you the desires of your heart. All you have to do is open the door.
We will return to our regularly scheduled writing/life
themed blogs soon.