So my year of not dating is almost to a close. The self imposed "ban" ends on December 1st, and I have to say that this year has been one of my best!
The reactions I have received vary from person to person, but most often the best reactions are when friends or acquaintances of my parents find out about my decision, or people who are older and have been married for some time.
"You're smart, of course you could find someone!"
"You're too beautiful to stay single!"
"There's plenty of guys, just put yourself out there!"
I only smile politely and change the topic.
You see, I didn't place this ban on dating because I couldn't "find" a guy. I placed this ban because I was sick and tired of "finding" men that were basically babies in adult form. Men who did not want the same things I want. Men who do not hold the same beliefs as me (or at least similar). Men who didn't want to grow up and get a good job.
And while dating is fun, I don't "date" to have "fun". I typically know within two weeks to a month if I can be with someone long term. I simply don't see the point in being with someone who is a drain on me mentally and physically, just to say I have a boyfriend.
So without further ado, my top 5 reasons I love being single!
Reason 1:
No extra money being bled out of my wallet for gas, movies, dinner, cards, gifts, dates etc.
When I get paid, I simply pay my bills, and save a little. If I decide to go out, it's only one person. I've actually been able to pay of debt that I got into when I was in college!
Reason 2:
I can watch any damn thing on TV/Netflix I want, and no one is there to judge!
All day crocheting marathon of: Gilmore Girls, Supernatural, Bones, Castle, Grimm, Dracula, Hell On Wheels (etc)....No Problem!
Reason 3:
My gym habits do not get in the way of a relationship. I've recently (for the last 5 weeks) been refocusing on my health and being fitter. Which means, I have been following the Weight Watchers plan, and going to the gym four to five times a week. This past Friday I was too jazzed up to sleep, so at 9PM I went and lifted some weights. This would have probably been frowned upon by a significant other. But I loved it!
Reason 4:
Speaking of getting in shape, and food. I don't have someone sabotaging my efforts! Usually when dating you go and get rich food like Chinese, Mexican, Italian, etc, at some restaurant. Being single, I cook at home, thus controlling better the ingredients included in my food. (Homemade, healthy, Mac n Cheese anyone? :)
Reason 5:
I'm happy! The only person I have to worry about is me. Well, and Roy of course! But if I decided tomorrow to move back to Washington State to go to school, or get a different job, I don't have to run it past anyone. I am twenty-four years old, now would be the time in my life to make any large(er) changes. I am not responsible for another person's happiness and well-being. And for now that is just fine with me!
DISCLAIMER:
While some of these reasons seem to be "shallow", I truly believe that many people stay in a dysfunctional, not healthy, relationship just to "have someone". I don't believe this is how we should live. People must learn about themselves before they can be in a healthy, loving relationship.
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